Saturday, December 1, 2007

Week-End Tally

'Tis the season that lasts forever...

Retail people, back me up on this! I know you're in the same boat.

We have been prepping and calculating since mid-October for business that will take place between December 5 and 24. Production on all of these plans kicked in a couple of weeks prior to Thanksgiving, leaving just a bit of breathing room after Halloween. Candied fruit was soaked in brandy long before you cooked your turkey last month, and the fruitcakes they inhabit were baked back then, too. Perhaps that gives a bit of insight into why no one actually likes them?

Holiday work is repetitive and boring. Items are made weeks in advance and held until they are needed. The assembly line chugs along all through December, anxiously awaiting "the most wonderful time of the year," which in my eyes is December 26 through mid-January. Business stops on a dime and we can resume comfortable 8-hour work days until the next seasonal upswing. Valentine's Day, Passover, Easter, Mother's Day, Graduation Season, Father's Day, Independence Day, fucking SWEETEST DAY. Did I miss anything?

Here's a tally of projects I did this past week. I don't even want to think about the hundreds of pounds of butter cookies, the numerous loaves of Stollen, and all of the holiday products my employer produces that I am not involved with. Enough is enough.

Yule Logs, Full Size: 40
Yule Logs, Mini: 320
Gingerbread Houses, Assembled: 18
Gingerbread Houses, Decorated: 12
Gingerbread Boys: 250
Snowman Cookies: 650
Christmas Tree Cakes, Assembled: 12
Petit Four Setups: 20 Full Sheets, Cut
Other Mini Pastries: 10 Full Sheets, Cut

There's been a constant stream of Christmas carols all day, every day, since the Friday after Thanksgiving. The same song sung by different artists is still the same song in my eyes. By this rational, I have heard about 6 songs on repeat for the past eight working days, and I'm about to lose my mind. I don't care whether Celine Dion or Mariah Carey is singing Oh Holy Night. They're both ruining my favorite Christmas song with their theatrics and insane vocal ranges.

The same songs, the same projects, the same people, the same four walls. It's enough to make you go sugar-free.


Patrick said...

i'll take a full size yule LOG please!

Nif said...

Me too!!!!!